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Episode 1301: Go!
Aired October 5, 2011
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I Love Soozee by Bill Demmery
Snoozy Suzie has a bad dream about 1950s-era television. Hyper Harry had better watch out!
Vox: Tonia Snow as Snoozy Suzie • Richard Parks as Hyper Harry • Marg Tannahill-Wade as Zsa-Zsa Patterstone • Marc-André Bélair as Announcer
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Mister Impatient by Bill Demmery
First aired in Episode #1102
Glass houses, and all that.
Vox: Marc-André Bélair as Complaining Hypocrite • Bill Demmery as Argumentive Man • Richard Hemphill as Server • Tonia Snow as Suffering Companion and Woman on Cellphone
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Candida and Geneva at the Movies by Richard Hemphill
First aired in Episode #1121
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Cooking with Ginger by Richard Hemphill
First aired in Episode #1120
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Whatever Happened to... Flower? by Bill Demmery and Tonia Snow
A touching look back at the career and current activities of Former Supermodel of the World, Flower.
Vox: Marg Tannahill-Wade as Flower • Bill Demmery as Announcer and Buck "Buck" Buckelstein • Richard Hemphill as Supermodel #3 and Cliff Rock • Tonia Snow as Supermodel #2 • Richard Parks as Talk Show Host
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Length: 26:09 | 6.1 MB | 32kbps. |
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Episode 1302: Watch Your Back
Aired October 12, 2011
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The Tooters by Bill Demmery
First aired in Episode #1103
A look at Medieval Royalty from a unique, flatulent perspective.
Vox: Richard Hemphill as The King • Marg Tannahill-Wade as Announcer • Chris Wardell as Sir Dirk
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Mortuary Workers by Richard Hemphill
First aired in Episode #207
Two mortuary workers discuss procrastination.
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Kanata 9-1-1, Episode #23 by Bill Demmery
First aired in Episode #1022
Our heroic seasoned Operator has to make a dreaded Judgement Call.
Vox: Amy Ford as Operator • Josh McMillan as Caller • Tonia Snow as Announcer
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The Treat Fairy by Bill Demmery
First aired in Episode #1215
She's craving a treat. She's going to get one--with the usual catch.
Vox: Marg Tannahill-Wade as Wife • Richard Parks as Husband • Richard Hemphill as The Treat Fairy
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Interview with an Alien by Richard Hemphill
First aired in Episode #1016
Alien scientists are coming!
Vox: Dan Enright as Alan Keylimepie (the alien) • Richard Hemphill as Phil Maficionado and Newt Newton • Marg Tannahill-Wade as Anemone Jones
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The Clown by Richard Hemphill
First aired in Episode #1122
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Length: 26:01 | 6.1 MB | 32kbps. |
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Episode 1303: 10... 30... 47... Hut-Hut!
Aired October 19, 2011
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Saliva by Richard Hemphill
First aired in Episode #1129
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Stick it to 'Em! by Tonia Snow
First aired in Episode #1128
Kid Pro Technologies helps you apply just the right balance of TLC and duct tape to your unruly or uncontrollable children.
Vox: Marc-André Bélair as Little Neville • Bill Demmery as Announcer • Marg Tannahill-Wade as Julie
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Children's Literability Campaign by Richard Hemphill
First aired in Episode #1121
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Snoozy Suzie in Charge by Bill Demmery
First aired in Episode #1214
Mom's off to a weekend getaway, and Suzie takes charge. Daddy has to earn his bacon!
Vox: Tonia Snow as Snoozy Suzie • Richard Parks as Hyper Harry • Marc-André Bélair as Max Kreeping • Marg Tannahill-Wade as Mom • Dave Wade as Dad
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Length: 25:43 | 6.0 MB | 32kbps. |
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Episode 1304: 2012 Funding Drive Episode #1
Aired October 26, 2011
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Sanguina, Countess of Blood by Richard Hemphill
First aired in Episode #723
Some pesky kids stumble upon the castle of the queen of all the vampires. But why, even in the presence of two juicy young boys, is the Countess of Blood having so much trouble, you know... getting fang?
Vox: Marc-André Bélair as Punt • Bill Demmery as Dondo • Richard Hemphill as Rumpquest • Nancy Kenny as Sanguina • Tonia Snow as Viola • Marg Tannahill-Wade as Pepper
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Length: 26:06 | 12.0 MB | 64kbps. |
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Episode 1305: 2012 Funding Drive Episode #2
Aired November 2, 2011
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Sanguina, Countess of Blood by Richard Hemphill
First aired in Episode #723
Some pesky kids stumble upon the castle of the queen of all the vampires. But why, even in the presence of two juicy young boys, is the Countess of Blood having so much trouble, you know... getting fang?
Vox: Marc-André Bélair as Punt • Bill Demmery as Dondo • Richard Hemphill as Rumpquest • Nancy Kenny as Sanguina • Tonia Snow as Viola • Marg Tannahill-Wade as Pepper
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Length: 26:06 | 12.0 MB | 64kbps. |
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Episode 1306: Idol Hands...
Aired November 9, 2011
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Dr. Sues by Laughterpiece Theatre
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Maritime Idol by Bill Demmery
First aired in Episode #1218
An East Coast talent show gets a bit obsessive.
Vox: Bill Demmery as Rex Murphy • Richard Parks as Klevin • Tonia Snow as Pearl • Richard Hemphill as Kermit and Old Guy
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Hammer Toilet Blowout by Dan Enright
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Kanata 9-1-1, Episode #26 by Bill Demmery
First aired in Episode #1216
A cheerleader enrolled in a Prominent Local Separate School suffers a debilitating texting-finger injury!
Vox: Tonia Snow as Announcer • Richard Parks as Operator • Marg Tannahill-Wade as Caller
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Snoozy Suzie Gets a Hobby by Bill Demmery
Pressed to take up a hobby, Suzie discovers botany. She's soon a little expert, and all's well--until she takes her 'grass' samples in to Show-and-Tell. Listen for the reference to 'decoy bacon.'
Vox: Tonia Snow as Snoozy Suzie • Marg Tannahill-Wade as Mom • Dave Wade as Dad • Richard Hemphill as Mr. Battelwagen • Marc-André Bélair as Max Kreeping
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Discover Reality by Bill Demmery
What are reality shows, really?
Vox: Richard Hemphill as Announcer
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Length: 26:08 | 6.1 MB | 32kbps. |
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Episode 1307: Talk Is Cheap
Aired November 16, 2011
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Everything Must Goia! by Laughterpiece Theatre
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The Shut-Up Fairy by Bill Demmery
First aired in Episode #1217
The world is such a loud place! If only there were a way to shut it up!
Vox: Tonia Snow as Wife • Marc-André Bélair as Husband • Richard Hemphill as Shut-Up Fairy
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Follow That Neutrino! by Bill Demmery
RP Science Correspondent Bill Demmery explains the potential implications of a recent report, from a science team in Europe, that nearly-massless particles known as 'neutrinos' appear to be exceeding the speed of light.
Vox: Richard Hemphill as Announcer • Bill Demmery as Himself
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The Leper by Bill Demmery
First aired in Episode #1103
Something's a little different about one of the contestants...
Vox: Dave Perkins as Announcer • Marg Tannahill-Wade as Woman • Richard Parks as Man
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Switzerland by Richard Hemphill
First aired in Episode #1120
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Four-Tress Doors by Dan Enright
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Mayor's Moment #11 by Bill Demmery
Fake Mayor Jim talks about current issues in the City, plus a sure-fire solution to embarrassing Booking Room videos.
Vox: Marg Tannahill-Wade as Carol-Anne Meighen-Ewen • Richard Parks as Fake Mayor Jim
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Yukon by Bill Demmery
First aired in Episode #1130
Hey, don't forget about Yukon when making your summer travel plans! We've got stuff to see, too!
Vox: Tonia Snow as Announcer
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Length: 25:14 | 5.9 MB | 32kbps. |
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Episode 1308: Southward Ho!
Aired November 23, 2011
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Restaurant Takeover by Bill Demmery
We came, we remodelled, we forged the ownership papers...
Vox: Tonia Snow as Woman • Richard Hemphill as Man • Richard Parks as Announcer
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Saltspring Fried Tofu by Bill Demmery
Col. Suzuki does tofu right, man!
Vox: Richard Hemphill as Announcer • Tonia Snow as Mom • Dan Enright as Col. Suzuki
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Cannabliserine by Laughterpiece Theatre
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The Local Ottawa Cougar by Bill Demmery and Tonia Snow
First aired in Episode #1009
Researchers track cougar activity at a local watering hole.
Vox: Bill Demmery as Australian Naturalist • Richard Hemphill as British Naturalist • Tonia Snow as Announcer
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eVast-dot-ca #2 by Bill Demmery
First aired in Episode #1231
eVast.ca boasts more pirate-wench matchups than any other online pirate datin' site. Come shiver yer timbers with us!
Vox: Richard Hemphill as Announcer • Tonia Snow as Margarelle
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Eight Days Toby Leary by Laughterpiece Theatre
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Aunt Dragonia by Richard Hemphill
First aired in Episode #333
Jeffy tries to extort toys out of his mother's girlfriend.
Vox: Richard Hemphill as Jeffy • Marg Tannahill-Wade as Aunt Dragonia
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Childsplay Architecture by Laughterpiece Theatre
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From the Plane by Richard Hemphill
First aired in Episode #207
Ochto, Warrior God of Praaaaan consults with his shrink.
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The Sex Fairy by Bill Demmery
First aired in Episode #1217
Want to make love like you never will again? Now, you can! (And never again.)
Vox: Marg Tannahill-Wade as Wife • Richard Parks as Husband • Richard Hemphill as Sex Fairy
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The Detonation Channel by Bill Demmery
Educational television features a lot of explosives, these days.
Vox: Richard Parks as Announcer
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Length: 26:01 | 6.1 MB | 32kbps. |
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Episode 1309: Dannylicious!
Aired November 30, 2011
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Desparitos by Laughterpiece Theatre
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Choking Hazard Barbie by Dan Enright
First aired in Episode #611
Introducing the little plastic bee-otch with hands of steel!
Vox: Damien Bailey as Announcer • Bill Demmery as Crusty Father • Dan Enright as Little Boy #3 • Richard Hemphill as Little Boy #1 • Andrew Kirkwood as Little Boy #2 • Tonia Snow as Little Girl • Marg Tannahill-Wade as Docile Mother and Flower
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Honest Ted's Funeral Fun Factory by Dan Enright
First aired in Episode #706
Honest Ted puts the fun back into funerals!
Vox: Bill Demmery as Honest Ted, Teen Dude and Pirate • Richard Hemphill as Mourning Man and Preacher • Tonia Snow as Little Girl and Raver Girl • Marg Tannahill-Wade as Old Lady
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Incarcerate Garbage Bags by Laughterpiece Theatre
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Unseasonal Disorder by Bill Demmery
First aired in Episode #728
What's your favourite season?
Vox: Dan Enright as He • Tonia Snow as She
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Sasquatch Achoo by Dan Enright
First aired in Episode #828
A Rheumy Sasquatch encounters a human in the forest.
Vox: Bill Demmery as Human • Dan Enright as Sasquatch
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Length: 22:18 | 5.2 MB | 32kbps. |
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Episode 1310: Bill Demmery's Snoozy Suzie's War
Aired December 7, 2011
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Snoozy Suzie's War by Bill Demmery
When Snoozy Suzie and Hyper Harry take a wrong turn and run afoul of the local gang of Juvenile Delinquents and Young Offenders, she plots horrible revenge. In the process, they hotwire the school bus and lead anti-terror forces (tipped off by an observant Fire Chief Burns) on a wild chase through the rough side of town. Harry gets away, outruns the newschopper, and qualifies for the Olympics; while Suzie inadvertently ends Stockwell Day's career. Mom and Dad suffer along sarcastically as Max and Carol-Anne deliver wall-to-wall coverage. A truly over-the-top performance by every member of the cast!
Vox: Marg Tannahill-Wade as Mom and Carol-Anne Meighen-Ewen • Tonia Snow as Snoozy Suzie • Dave Wade as Dad • Richard Parks as Hyper Harry • Richard Hemphill as Chief Woody Burns • Bill Demmery as Geezix • Marc-André Bélair as Max Kreeping
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Length: 26:18 | 6.2 MB | 32kbps. |
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Episode 1311: Richard Hemphill's As the Pole Turns
Aired December 14, 2011
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As the Pole Turns 2005 by Richard Hemphill
First aired in Episode #710
Poor Santa Claus and the residents of the North Pole are thrown into melodramatic mayhem when Rudolph's alcoholism and Mrs. Claus' infidelity surface during the Christmas season. Featuring seasonal old school hip hop classics. A re-editing of the original hour-long classic from Season Three.
Vox: Richard Hemphill as Dr. Nudo, Elf Two, Jeffy, Lester Beware, Mandrake, Phone Voice and Vlad • Chris Laursen as Elf One, Onion and Santa Claus • Marg Tannahill-Wade as Mrs. Claus and Sammy • Shalome Swinamer as Soap Voice, Trixie and Wilma • Rachel Tannahill as Vienna de Beauchampignon
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Length: 29:35 | 13.0 MB | 64kbps. |
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Episode 1312: A Special Presentation
Aired December 28, 2011
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Special Presentation by Remote Planet
A number of the Remote Planet crew gathered in the studio for a special, 90-minute episode. Reminisces mingled with an ad-hoc selection of sketches from the vaults. Feedback on Twitter trended ambivalently.
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Episode 1313: Bill Demmery's Santa Claus Is Running This Town
Aired January 4, 2012
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Santa Claus Is Running This Town by Bill Demmery
First aired in Episode #709
Santa Claus hires some muscle to help with 'donations' at the Toy Parade. Tooth Fairy subplot shamelessly appropriated from Richard Hemphill.
Vox: Marc-André Bélair as Max Kreeping • Bill Demmery as Vito Chiarelli • Richard Hemphill as Fire Chief Woody Burns • Tonia Snow as Little Suzie • Marg Tannahill-Wade as Verma Celli • Dave Wade as Santa Claus
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Length: 28:51 | 13.0 MB | 64kbps. |
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Episode 1314: Let's Go Sailing
Aired January 11, 2012
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Québec by Bill Demmery
First aired in Episode #1131
Come visit Québec - we're not just about referendums anymore!
Vox: Richard Hemphill as Announcer
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Man About Town by Tonia Snow
First aired in Episode #732
Street interviews turn ugly on the Q Channel.
Vox: Bill Demmery as Random Man • Richard Hemphill as Burt Doodley • Marg Tannahill-Wade as Random Woman
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Round and Round by Bill Demmery and Derek & Jen Bradshaw
First aired in Episode #1002
Traffic circles can be confusing, the first time round.
Vox: Richard Parks as Husband • Tonia Snow as Wife
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Just Like Nana Used to Make by Bill Demmery and Tonia Snow
First aired in Episode #1002
Try our East Coast delicacies - Fried Onions 'n Taters, yum!
Vox: Bill Demmery as Angus • Richard Hemphill as Announcer and Girl • Tonia Snow as Agnes • Marg Tannahill-Wade as Nana
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OCD3K by Richard Hemphill
First aired in Episode #1122
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Breaking News by Richard Hemphill
First aired in Episode #1129
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Wednesday Morning Dark Roast by Bill Demmery
First aired in Episode #1106
Tic gets twitchy over some obsessively good java.
Vox: Bill Demmery as Bob • Tic as Himself
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Kanata 9-1-1, Episode #19 by Bill Demmery
First aired in Episode #934
Our selfless heroes race to re-initialise the victims of a Blackberry-Blackberry collision.
Vox: Marc-André Bélair as Operator #2 • Bill Demmery as Operator #1 • Amy Ford as Operator #3 • Richard Hemphill as Caller #2 • Richard Parks as Caller #3 • Tonia Snow as Announcer • Marg Tannahill-Wade as Caller #1
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Length: 24:29 | 5.7 MB | 32kbps. |
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Episode 1315: Hello Hello?
Aired January 18, 2012
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Northwest Territories: Come Visit Before It's Gone! by Bill Demmery
First aired in Episode #1227
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Super God by Chris Laursen
First aired in Episode #503
God is challenged by a megalomaniac who claims to be Super God.
Vox: Bill Demmery as God • Dan Enright as Super God • Chris Laursen as St. Peter
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The Undertheweather Network by Bill Demmery
First aired in Episode #1233
Gentle weather for the morning after the night before.
Vox: Bill Demmery as Announcer • Richard Hemphill as Voiceover
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Glade Byward Market Collection by Bill Demmery and Tonia Snow
First aired in Episode #935
Bring back fond memories of the Market with Cocaine Quickie, Drunken Fistfight and After the Police Raid!
Vox: Marc-André Bélair as Kid • Richard Hemphill as Dad • Richard Parks as Announcer • Tonia Snow as Mom
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Discover Torontario by Bill Demmery
First aired in Episode #1035
Water, water, water and one city--come visit Torontario!
Vox: Richard Hemphill as Announcer
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Baby's First Baptism by Richard Hemphill
First aired in Episode #1120
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Candida and Geneva at the Blood Bank by Richard Hemphill
First aired in Episode #1016
Candida and Geneva donate a pint and take the usual pound of flesh.
Vox: Pat Gauthier as Squeev • Tonia Snow as Candida • Marg Tannahill-Wade as Geneva
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The Friday Fairy by Bill Demmery and Tonia Snow
First aired in Episode #1008
Be careful what you wish for!
Vox: Marc-André Bélair as Co-Worker and Getaway Genie • Richard Hemphill as Friday Fairy • Tonia Snow as Rima
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Length: 21:02 | 4.9 MB | 32kbps. |
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Episode 1316: No Place to Hyde
Aired January 25, 2012
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The Housework Fairy by Bill Demmery
First aired in Episode #1108
He loves doing housework. She's happy to toss him the lot.
Vox: Richard Hemphill as Housework Fairy • Marg Tannahill-Wade as Woman
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Cat Farm by Richard Hemphill
First aired in Episode #1016
Kids visit the Flatulent Cat Farm.
Vox: Bill Demmery as Dan • Richard Hemphill as Unidentified Adult Character • Tonia Snow as Kid #1 • Marg Tannahill-Wade as Kid #2
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Cough! by Richard Hemphill
First aired in Episode #1129
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The Germinator by Bill Demmery
First aired in Episode #1223
Gay action-hero Helmut Weissenegger stars in a new romp, at his fortified compound just outside the Seaway community code-named "Stinkytown". When boredom sets in, he takes up gardening--only to find himself in a life-or-death struggle with hordes of invading vermin!
Vox: Bill Demmery as Helmut Weissenegger • Dave Wade as Hoe Boy • Richard Hemphill as Narrator
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Length: 25:00 | 5.9 MB | 32kbps. |
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Episode 1317: Springtime in Texas
Aired February 1, 2012
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El Trapudor by Bill Demmery
First aired in Episode #1225
El Trapudor explains the ins-and-outs of KooKoo's commitment-free cellphone plans!
Vox: Bill Demmery as El Trapudor
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Mine's Bigger than Yours by Bill Demmery
First aired in Episode #1010
Three men sneak into the woods to compare their equipment.
Vox: Marc-André Bélair as Richard • Bill Demmery as Harold • Richard Hemphill as Thomas
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Bunny Town One by Richard Hemphill
First aired in Episode #1121
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Moist by Jimmy and the Love Muffins and Richard Parks
First aired in Episode #915
A cheeky little song about moistness.
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Big Boss Baby by Richard Hemphill
First aired in Episode #1124
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Mime in a Box by Richard Hemphill
First aired in Episode #1124
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Kanata 9-1-1, Episode #25 by Bill Demmery
First aired in Episode #1035
A newly-naturalised Downtowner paints his garage door plain blue. Only the heroic Operator can save the Kanatan social fabric from unwinding!
Vox: Marc-André Bélair as Operator and Fella • Richard Hemphill as Announcer and Caller #3 • Tonia Snow as Caller #1, Caller #2 and Cop
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Length: 25:44 | 6.0 MB | 32kbps. |
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Episode 1318: Still Not Famous
Aired February 8, 2012
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Cavemensa by Richard Hemphill
First aired in Episode #1124
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Dream Date 3 by Bill Demmery
They texted all night, then went home!
Vox: Tonia Snow as Home Girl • Marg Tannahill-Wade as Date Girl
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The Warmup Fairy by Bill Demmery
First aired in Episode #1225
Warming up for exercise is hard work. What if you could bypass it?
Vox: Marg Tannahill-Wade as Woman #1 • Tonia Snow as Woman #2 • Richard Hemphill as Warmup Fairy
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Bunny Town Two by Richard Hemphill
First aired in Episode #1121
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Skeeter's Deli by Richard Hemphill
First aired in Episode #1121
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Yvonne by Richard Hemphill
First aired in Episode #1124
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Kanata 9-1-1, Episode #21 by Bill Demmery
Celebrity Guest Operators face the horrors of Personal Lifestyle Emergencies!
Vox: Richard Hemphill as Announcer and Operator #3 • Richard Parks as Fake Mayor Larry • Marg Tannahill-Wade as Caller #1 • Bill Demmery as Wayne Rostad and Caller #3 • Tonia Snow as Caller #2
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Length: 25:14 | 5.9 MB | 32kbps. |
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Episode 1319: Bill Demmery's Snoozy Suzie's Valentine
Aired February 15, 2012
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Snoozy Suzie's Valentine (Director's Cut) by Bill Demmery
First aired in Episode #1019
Little Snoozy Suzie rails against the overcommercialisation of Valentine's Day, and ignites a massive riot. Geezix recovers from his Hallowe'en injuries and becomes an inspiration to all, and Fire Chief Burns whips the Juvenile Delinquents into shape.
Originally aired in two parts. Condensed and presented here as a single episode.
Vox: Marc-André Bélair as Juvenile Delinquent and Max Kreeping • Bill Demmery as Geezix • Richard Hemphill as Fire Chief Woody Burns and Mr. Muchengelt • Richard Parks as Hyper Harry • Tonia Snow as Snoozy Suzie • Marg Tannahill-Wade as Carol-Anne Meighen-Ewen, Mom, Mrs. Battelwagen and Stefany • Dave Wade as Dad
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Length: 37:24 | 8.8 MB | 32kbps. |
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Episode 1320: Dodging Bullets
Aired February 22, 2012
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Sniffer Duster by Bill Demmery
First aired in Episode #1231
Sometimes, a commercial voiceover just sounds silly.
Vox: Marg Tannahill-Wade as Announcer
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Ama and the Bus by Richard Hemphill
First aired in Episode #1124
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Happily Ever After, Part II by Bill Demmery and Tonia Snow
First aired in Episode #1010
Don't expect a storybook ending when 'Rella, 'Beauty and the rest of the gang get together for a bitchfest.
Vox: Bill Demmery as Dopey • Richard Hemphill as Snow White • Tonia Snow as Cinderella • Marg Tannahill-Wade as Rapunzel and Sleeping Beauty
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Mac vs. PC #02 by Bill Demmery
First aired in Episode #832
Mac gets the horrifying urge to do real work after his st'owner installs Vista.
Vox: Richard Hemphill as PC • Richard Parks as Mac
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Farmer's Minute #3 by Bill Demmery
First aired in Episode #832
Carl, from Carlsbad Springs, explains the fine art of sheep f*ncing.
Vox: Bill Demmery as Carl • Marg Tannahill-Wade as Announcer
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Screaming Pitchmen by Richard Hemphill
First aired in Episode #1122
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Kanata 9-1-1, Episode #15 by Bill Demmery
First aired in Episode #902
Two parallel calls concerning the same incident--one to Kanata 9-1-1 and one to Regular 9-1-1--illustrate the stark language gap between versatile, socially functional Kanatan and the blunt, limited Downtowner dialect.
Vox: Marc-André Bélair as Operator #2 • Amy Ford as Operator #1 • Josh McMillan as Caller #2 • Richard Parks as Caller #1 • Tonia Snow as Announcer
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PEI - Way Overdone! by Bill Demmery
First aired in Episode #1017
You're all about tacky and overdone. So are we!
Vox: Tonia Snow as Announcer
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Length: 25:46 | 6.0 MB | 32kbps. |
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Episode 1321: Bill Demmery's Snoozy Suzie Goes Corporate
Aired February 29, 2012
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Snoozy Suzie Goes Corporate by Bill Demmery
First aired in Episode #1126
Little Suzie sets up a lemonade stand, with the help of her little boyfriend, Hyper Harry. Relentless in their quest for market dominance, they're soon bigger than Microsoft. Then the investigations begin!
Vox: Marc-André Bélair as Max Kreeping • Richard Hemphill as Clerk and Man #1 • Richard Parks as Hyper Harry • Tonia Snow as Snoozy Suzie • Marg Tannahill-Wade as Mom • Dave Wade as Dad
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Length: 25:51 | 6.0 MB | 32kbps. |
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Episode 1322: Fetch the Groundhog
Aired March 7, 2012
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TravelVelocity.com by Bill Demmery
First aired in Episode #825
The garden gnome goes to Mexico!
Vox: Bill Demmery as Garden Gnome • Richard Hemphill as El Dudo • Richard Parks as Announcer
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Bullshit Express by Bill Demmery
First aired in Episode #1001
He's full of it, but he did use his points...
Vox: Marc-André Bélair as Man #2 • Bill Demmery as Man #3 • Richard Hemphill as Man #1 • Marg Tannahill-Wade as Voiceover
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Swisher Mop by Bill Demmery
First aired in Episode #809
Retired adult video stars Jon Buryme and Candi Cans flog a revolutionary new mop in their own inimitable way.
Vox: Bill Demmery as Jon Buryme • Tonia Snow as Candi Cans
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Mac vs. PC #07 by Bill Demmery
First aired in Episode #902
PC and Mac's new pirate acquaintance has a visit from the recording industry.
Vox: Bill Demmery as Pirate • Richard Hemphill as PC • Richard Parks as Mac • Tonia Snow as Lawyer
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Flight of the Dildo by Bill Demmery
First aired in Episode #901
Why Newfoundland will never have a space program.
Vox: Bill Demmery as Announcer and Technician • Juanita DeVos as CAPCOM • Richard Hemphill as Cleetus and Seamus • Tonia Snow as Pearl • Marg Tannahill-Wade as Tatiana
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Length: 24:52 | 5.8 MB | 32kbps. |
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Episode 1323: Praise the Groundhog
Aired March 14, 2012
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The Big Oh! by Bill Demmery
First aired in Episode #830
News item: Olympic Stadium finally paid off! (And falling apart...)
Vox: Amy Ford as Mlle. Lortie • Richard Hemphill as Mayor Tremblay • Richard Parks as M. Potvin • Marg Tannahill-Wade as Announcer and Mme. Guertin
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Wayne Rostad's On the Rug Again by Bill Demmery
First aired in Episode #907
This time, Wayne's posing for beefcake shots.
Vox: Bill Demmery as Wayne Rostad
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Round and Round by Bill Demmery and Derek & Jen Bradshaw
First aired in Episode #1002
Traffic circles can be confusing, the first time round.
Vox: Richard Parks as Husband • Tonia Snow as Wife
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The Rectal Muffler by Tonia Snow
First aired in Episode #719
D'you smell cherries?
Vox: Bill Demmery as Nerdy Guy • Richard Hemphill as Announcer • Tonia Snow as Tired Lady and Supermodel
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Daddys' Boys by Bill Demmery and Tonia Snow
First aired in Episode #805
Ben and Justin trade barbs and boasts.
Vox: Marc-André Bélair as Justin • Andrew Kirkwood as Ben
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OnStar for Baby Buggies by Bill Demmery and Tonia Snow
First aired in Episode #1001
Automatic tippy-bumpies detection for your child's stroller.
Vox: Marc-André Bélair as Announcer • Tonia Snow as OnStar Voice
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Equal Opportunity Bigot by Tonia Snow
First aired in Episode #724
Offense is in the selective eye of the beholder.
Vox: Marc-André Bélair as Joe • Richard Hemphill as Bubba-Cooter
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Kanata 9-1-1, Episode #16 by Bill Demmery
First aired in Episode #906
PVR Not working! A Kanata Resident must replace her PVR when the hard drive fills up.
Vox: Marc-André Bélair as Operator • Tonia Snow as Announcer • Marg Tannahill-Wade as Guest Host
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Wayne Rostad's On the Dole Again by Bill Demmery
First aired in Episode #907
Oops, he's been cancelled!
Vox: Bill Demmery as Wayne Rostad • Richard Parks as Producer
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Length: 24:44 | 5.8 MB | 32kbps. |
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Episode 1324: Hitting the Beach
Aired March 21, 2012
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A Fine Romance by Richard Hemphill
First aired in Episode #604
...except, he's married...
Vox: Richard Hemphill as Reginald • Marg Tannahill-Wade as Betty
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Cyberplagiarist by Richard Hemphill
First aired in Episode #1122
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The Fertility Fairy by Bill Demmery
First aired in Episode #1231
Gotta hold the Fertility Fairy at bay.
Vox: Marg Tannahill-Wade as Wife • Marc-André Bélair as Husband • Richard Hemphill as Fertility Fairy
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Reference Desk by Richard Hemphill
First aired in Episode #1123
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You Bet Your Breath! by Bill Demmery
First aired in Episode #1017
Introducing the game show where pausing for air is only an option!
Vox: Bill Demmery as Ken • Richard Hemphill as Wheezer Puff (host) • Tonia Snow as Announcer • Marg Tannahill-Wade as Sue
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Super Virginal BC by Bill Demmery
First aired in Episode #1035
As you've seen on TV, BC is only inhabited by skiers and kayakers.
Vox: Marg Tannahill-Wade as Announcer
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Kanata 9-1-1, Episode #20 by Bill Demmery and Tonia Snow
First aired in Episode #1015
An examination of two "frivolous" calls shows one to be a very legitimate emergency in God's Little Cornfield.
Vox: Richard Hemphill as Caller #1 and Operator #2 • Richard Parks as Caller #2 and Operator #1
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Length: 24:35 | 5.8 MB | 32kbps. |
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Episode 1325: Richard Hemphill's Hayseeds
Aired March 28, 2012
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Hayseeds by Richard Hemphill
First aired in Episode #1226
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Length: 25:38 | 6.0 MB | 32kbps. |
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Episode 1326: Going Green
Aired April 4, 2012
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Pet in the Can by Richard Hemphill
First aired in Episode #1123
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IOU Direct #08 by Bill Demmery
First aired in Episode #1032
Oops! Seems when the government takes your money without your permission, it's a social service. When a bank does it, it's gouging. Our bad!
Vox: Bill Demmery as IOU Banker Guy • Richard Hemphill as Announcer
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Kanata 9-1-1, Episode #12 by Bill Demmery
First aired in Episode #833
A malfunctioning new-generation, in-dash, voice-activated GPS navigation system crashes, stranding a Blackberry-Eyed driver.
Vox: Richard Hemphill as Caller • Nancy Kenny as Operator • Tonia Snow as Announcer
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So You Think You Can Type! by Bill Demmery
First aired in Episode #1015
Test your typing to the limit on this great new radio reality show!
Vox: Marc-André Bélair as Jeremichael and Willandrew • Richard Hemphill as Host and Judge • Tonia Snow as Announcer and Tracelle
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Augusta and Macon by Richard Hemphill
First aired in Episode #318
Augusta Georgia exposes her husband Macon's redundant life anecdotes for what they are.
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Length: 24:53 | 5.8 MB | 32kbps. |
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Episode 1327: It's All a Myth
Aired April 11, 2012
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Job Interview by Richard Hemphill
First aired in Episode #1120
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My Special Day by Bill Demmery
First aired in Episode #1035
Lise calls Sam with big news: she's pregnant! Naturally, Sam's busy giving birth to triplets.
Vox: Tonia Snow as Lise • Marg Tannahill-Wade as Sam
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Kanata 9-1-1, Episode #18 by Bill Demmery
First aired in Episode #1002
Life in Kanata is just better... except when the ill winds of Carp blow over the landfill.
Vox: Amy Ford as Caller #3 • Josh McMillan as Operator • Richard Parks as Caller #2 • Tonia Snow as Announcer • Marg Tannahill-Wade as Caller #1
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Farmer's Minute #4 by Bill Demmery
First aired in Episode #936
Elmer from Winchester talks about c*ck husbandry. So to speak.
Vox: Richard Hemphill as Host • Richard Parks as Elmer • Tonia Snow as Announcer
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IOU Direct #05 by Bill Demmery
First aired in Episode #1017
Introducing a new banking service: acquiring and protecting your money from you!
Vox: Bill Demmery as IOU Banker Guy • Marg Tannahill-Wade as Woman • Richard Hemphill as Man
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Shopping with Satan by Bill Demmery
First aired in Episode #914
Satan takes a guest on a shopping romp on his home turf... er, make that Wal-Mart.
Vox: Bill Demmery as Alarm Voice, Clerk and Little Kid • Richard Hemphill as Himself • Marg Tannahill-Wade as Announcer and Old Lady
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Length: 26:10 | 6.1 MB | 32kbps. |
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Episode 1328: Marjorana What?
Aired April 18, 2012
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Door to Door by Richard Hemphill
First aired in Episode #1123
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Camping! by Bill Demmery
First aired in Episode #906
Don't forget the hi-def and the XBox!
Vox: Marc-André Bélair as Justin • Richard Parks as Tyler
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Inside the Newscasters' Studio by Bill Demmery
First aired in Episode #1006
Max Kreeping tries to emulate a popular PBS series.
Vox: Marc-André Bélair as Max Kreeping • Bill Demmery as Voiceover • Richard Parks as Burt Dudely
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Antiques Road Show in Space by Richard Hemphill
First aired in Episode #225
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IOU Direct #03 by Bill Demmery
First aired in Episode #823
The creepy banker guy goes back in time to spread the message of impersonal electronic banking.
Vox: Bill Demmery as IOU Banker Guy • Richard Hemphill as Cave Man • Shalome Swinamer as Cave Woman
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TravelVelocity.ca #2 by Bill Demmery
First aired in Episode #1022
Our favourite little impostor globetrotting garden gnome catches more than fish.
Vox: Bill Demmery as Garden Gnome • Amy Ford as Announcer
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Kanata 9-1-1, Episode #17 by Bill Demmery
First aired in Episode #908
Entire Internet Down! A broken coffee-shop router threatens to bring down Kanatan Civilisation as we know it.
Vox: Dan Enright as Guest Host • Richard Parks as Caller • Tonia Snow as Announcer and Operator
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Length: 25:49 | 6.1 MB | 32kbps. |
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Episode 1329: Richard Hemphill's Star Power Princess
Aired April 25, 2012
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Star Power Princess by Richard Hemphill
First aired in Episode #702
Newly invested with super powers, Princess Star-Anise travels to the South-Eastern Provinces with her tubercular chipmunk to do battle with her father's sworn enemy, General Tsao, who turns out not to be quite as evil as expected.
Vox: Bill Demmery as King Pow and Pucker • Dan Enright as General Tsao • Richard Hemphill as Sorceror, Jimmy-Page and Doctor Mu-Shu • Nancy Kenny as Princess Star Anise • Marg Tannahill-Wade as Narrator and Ptomaine
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Length: 26:05 | 12.0 MB | 64kbps. |
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Episode 1330: Hockeh Ambivuhlence
Aired May 2, 2012
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Blooming Discoveries #1 by Bill Demmery
Flower discusses the implications of the recent observation of a marjorana particle, and whether you can get any on the streets of Amsterdam.
Vox: Marg Tannahill-Wade as Flower • Richard Parks as Announcer
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Uruguay by Richard Hemphill
First aired in Episode #1120
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Kitten Cannon by Richard Hemphill
First aired in Episode #1016
Here's a new toy for bored cat owners!
Vox: Bill Demmery as Romulus • Richard Hemphill as Announcer • Richard Parks as Remus
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Mayor's Moment #09 by Bill Demmery
First aired in Episode #1208
Outgoing Fake Mayor Larry waxes philosophically about leaving office and the great cycle of politics.
Vox: Richard Parks as Fake Mayor Larry • Marg Tannahill-Wade as Carol-Anne Meighen-Ewen
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Radio Hosts Gone Wild by Bill Demmery
First aired in Episode #1106
"the most exciting thing to hit radio since crippling corporate homogeneity!"
Vox: Marc-André Bélair as Announcer • Richard Hemphill as Ken • Richard Parks as Steve • Tonia Snow as The Tigress • Marg Tannahill-Wade as Barb
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Kanata 9-1-1, Episode #34 by Bill Demmery
"Make me speak hockey!" The Emergency Sports Briefing Unit saves Denizens from Social Function Embarrassment!
Vox: Tonia Snow as Announcer • Richard Parks as Operator • Marg Tannahill-Wade as Caller #1 • Richard Hemphill as Caller #2 and Hailee
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Length: 26:01 | 6.1 MB | 32kbps. |
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Episode 1331: Spring Fevers
Aired May 9, 2012
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Butch Landers - New School Bully by Richard Hemphill
First aired in Episode #1120
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Post Responsibly #1 by Bill Demmery
Think twice, click once!
Vox: Marg Tannahill-Wade as Granny • Bill Demmery as Jimmy and Announcer
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Blooming Discoveries #2 by Bill Demmery
Anecdotal evidence suggests that some women have orgasms at the gym. Flower explains it all before embarking on her new fitness plan!
Vox: Marg Tannahill-Wade as Flower • Richard Parks as Announcer
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Bashing the Fat by Tonia Snow
First aired in Episode #808
Let the Nutripharmagenobiological Society help you lose weight the spirit-crushing way!
Vox: Bill Demmery as Announcer • Richard Hemphill as Jurgen • Andrew Kirkwood as Angus and Wimpy Guy • Tonia Snow as Mandy
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Frequent Bang Theory by Bill Demmery
For a bunch of stereotypical nerds, the banging is surprisingly frequent.
Vox: Richard Parks as Erwin • Richard Hemphill as Werner • Bill Demmery as Kip and Brad • Marg Tannahill-Wade as Katie • Tonia Snow as Cheavaugn
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Mayor's Moment #10 by Bill Demmery
First aired in Episode #1217
Incoming (and former) Fake Mayor Jim talks about his plans.
Vox: Richard Parks as Fake Mayor Jim • Marg Tannahill-Wade as Carol-Anne Meighen-Ewen
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Kanata 9-1-1, Episode #33 by Bill Demmery
Traumatized residents report a Non-Big-Box/Non-Chain Local Retailer in a local shopping mall.
Vox: Tonia Snow as Announcer • Richard Hemphill as Operator • Marg Tannahill-Wade as Caller
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The Allergy Fairy by Bill Demmery
A sympathetically-suffering supernatural gives relief from springtime allergies. No catch.
Vox: Marg Tannahill-Wade as Wife • Bill Demmery as Husband • Richard Hemphill as Allergy Fairy
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Length: 25:31 | 6.0 MB | 32kbps. |
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Episode 1332: Star Your Roto-Tillers
Aired May 16, 2012
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The Heckling Fairy by Bill Demmery
Who knew that comedians could invoke the Heckling Fairy? Look out!
Vox: Marg Tannahill-Wade as Wife • Richard Hemphill as Heckling Fairy
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Animal Hospital by Richard Hemphill
First aired in Episode #1121
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Dream Date by Tonia Snow
First aired in Episode #835
Nothing beats a relationship based on botox and hair-weaves.
Vox: Bill Demmery as Kalan • Marg Tannahill-Wade as Brianna
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Post Responsibly #2 by Bill Demmery
'Liking' everything in sight says a lot about you. Think twice, click once!
Vox: Tonia Snow as Wife • Richard Parks as Husband • Bill Demmery as Announcer
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Baby Dyke Dolls by Richard Hemphill
First aired in Episode #1017
Introducing the 'alternative' doll.
Vox: Pat Gauthier as Announcer • Tonia Snow as Sam • Marg Tannahill-Wade as Mom
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The Snobby Dollar by Tonia Snow
First aired in Episode #828
Does it matter where it comes from, if it's only a buck?
Vox: Bill Demmery as Customer • Richard Hemphill as Clerk
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Kanata 9-1-1, Episode #32 by Bill Demmery
"I'm in Downtownland, and it sucks!" Confused by all the nonsensical straight-line streets, a Disoriented Denizen calls for assistance.
Vox: Tonia Snow as Announcer • Richard Parks as Operator • Richard Hemphill as Caller
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Length: 25:16 | 5.9 MB | 32kbps. |
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Episode 1333: Cleared to Land
Aired May 23, 2012
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Post Responsibly #3 by Bill Demmery
Watch that erexting! Think twice, click once!
Vox: Richard Hemphill as Dad • Bill Demmery as Son and Announcer
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The Bus Fairy by Bill Demmery
Sometimes, no magic is required.
Vox: Tonia Snow as Woman #1 • Marg Tannahill-Wade as Woman #2 • Richard Hemphill as Bus Fairy
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Moments with Mayor Ford by Bill Demmery
A day in the life of Toronto Mayor Rob Ford. Kids, to the Mayorbunker!
Vox: Bill Demmery as Mayor Ford • Marg Tannahill-Wade as Kid #1 and Assistant • Richard Hemphill as Paperboy and Kid #2 • Tonia Snow as Mrs. Ford
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Mayor's Moment #12 by Bill Demmery
Fake Mayor Jim talks, as he often does, about LRT and OC Transpo.
Vox: Bill Demmery as Graham Crackerson and Fake Mayor Jim
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Pimp My Walker by Bill Demmery and Tonia Snow
First aired in Episode #1002
Grandma's getting her walker all pimped-out. Be very afraid.
Vox: Bill Demmery as Billy • Richard Hemphill as Announcer and Seamus • Marg Tannahill-Wade as Grandma • Dave Wade as Pete Sr.
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Kanata 9-1-1, Episode #30 by Bill Demmery
An elaborate, meticulously-planned, informal team dinner is running short on supplies!
Vox: Tonia Snow as Announcer • Richard Hemphill as Operator • Marg Tannahill-Wade as Caller
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Length: 24:46 | 5.8 MB | 32kbps. |
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Episode 1334: Adieu Marg and Dave!
Aired May 30, 2012
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Saskatchewan--We Can See Ya Comin' fer Three Days! by Bill Demmery
First aired in Episode #1031
You won't catch us by surprise in Sunny Saskatchewan! *Note: Marg recorded this skit in one take. We think she was channelling Wanda from Corner Gas...
Vox: Marg Tannahill-Wade as Announcer
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Hiring Nikki by Bill Demmery and Tonia Snow
First aired in Episode #1009
She's rude, lazy, profane and volatile and hates people; a natural flight attendant!
Vox: Richard Parks as Evan • Tonia Snow as Catherine
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Mayor's Moment #05 by Bill Demmery
First aired in Episode #1109
Fake Mayor Larry holds forth on light rail, efficient decision-making, and service charges.
Vox: Marg Tannahill-Wade as Carol-Anne Meighen-Ewen • Richard Parks as Fake Mayor Larry
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Courting Margaret by Bill Demmery and Dave Wade
First aired in Episode #823
A dramatic enactment of what was supposed to happen in-studio last summer. (Yes, they did actually get married!)
Vox: Richard Hemphill as Matt Damon as Richard Hemphill • Tonia Snow as Herself • Marg Tannahill-Wade as Herself • Dave Wade as Himself
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Children's Literability Campaign by Richard Hemphill
First aired in Episode #1121
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Length: 21:47 | 5.1 MB | 32kbps. |
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